From the Book of Bill Snyder, our most holy text on Junior College recruiting:

“And the Dark Lord Saban prepared for a journey, and he packed many days’ rations, and clean underwear for a fortnight.  He journed far to the west, and he came upon the Great Mountain.  Knowing his trek was almost at an end, he delighted, and began his ascent to the summit.  When he reached the top, his terrible voice rang out, ‘Rise, aight, and come follow me!’  And the mountain rose from the ground, and many dining hall cooks cried out in terror.”

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